The votes are in for the first elimination from Survivor: Blogoshere Island. Happily I received not a single vote to toss me. Unhappily for Pylorns he received five of six and got booted.

Pylorns, don't look at it as getting tossed, look at it as winning the first vote by a landslide. If only you had voted for yourself it would have been unanimous.

Posted by: Jim at 12:13 PM | Comments (9) | Add Comment
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1 Honey, in my part of the hemisphere, getting tossed means getting a hand job. Did YOU give him one?

Posted by: Helen at November 14, 2003 12:15 PM (k78uM)

2 I win! Dopple-G thought Pylorns would jump on that first but I said "No way, man. Helen will be on that like Rikki-tikki-tavi on a cobra." :-)

Posted by: Jim at November 14, 2003 12:29 PM (IOwam)

3 That's not what you said last night...

Posted by: pylorns at November 14, 2003 01:32 PM (oMGhn)

4 Last night I was medicated. Totally doesn't count. I call drunk guy exemption.

Posted by: Jim at November 14, 2003 02:02 PM (IOwam)

5 Not only did you guess that I would pounce on that linguistic error, you mentioned Rikki-Tikki-Tavi in a post. It's official. I worship Jim.

Posted by: Helen at November 14, 2003 02:14 PM (k78uM)

6 Man I love that movie. I used to try using references to it all the time but nobody would get them. If you move, I will strike. If you do not move, i will strike. Oh, yeah.

Posted by: Jim at November 14, 2003 02:46 PM (IOwam)

7 Movie.. Book man Book!

Posted by: pylorns at November 14, 2003 03:52 PM (mkbJL)

8 Rudyard Kipling was the bomb in phantoms.. er..

Posted by: pylorns at November 14, 2003 03:54 PM (mkbJL)

9 It was the movie for me, as a very young lad. Although I've got both on my Wish List.

Posted by: Jim at November 14, 2003 05:01 PM (IOwam)

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Hey! I'm vain as hell. How come my entries keep getting lost? This is like 4 out of the last 6 where I'm missing. Dammit.

Anyway, it's over here.

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(I wonder how many times I'll use that as a post title before it gets old?)

It's time to vote for the first Immunity Challenge for Survivor: The Blogosphere Edition.

I'm not allowed to tell you which one is mine or Don will molest my cow but it shouldn't be too difficult for you to figure it out. Look for brilliance, insight, humor and smugness. That's me in a nutshell. Plus humility, of course.

Posted by: Jim at 02:20 PM | Comments (4) | Add Comment
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Ryan has a post worthy of all our fecal praise.

Here's the problem with shuffling up too far on the toilet seat, and this is what I noticed just a short while ago on the crapper. As any veteran male pooper knows, when you clench off a fecal fragment, your wang twitches. Or, maybe it's just me, but whatever. The point is, when I flex the appropriate kegel muscles to pinch off a turdlett, my pecker does a little spasm dance that usually involves brief upward motion.

Cuppa coffee and a poop post. Wednesday is starting very well.

Posted by: Jim at 06:42 AM | Comments (8) | Add Comment
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My life is rated NC-17.
What is your life rated?

Damn. How am I going to get the Junior High girls with a rating like that?

(Link ripped from LeeAnn, who will unfortunately be swimming home within a few weeks)

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It's Veteran's Day and I've had some serious blues going on. I usually do on this day. It's part nostalgia, part loss and maybe a little bit of self pity thrown in. Maybe a lot of that last one, actually.

Anyway, I just read a wonderful post by Michele that has picked me up quite a bit. Thanks Michele.

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One of the things in Kim's rant that I did agree with but didn't have the time to blog about has been expounded upon by Craig Henry. Specifically, men are protrayed as bumbling idiots in commercials and in many entertainment vehicles.

To go further, while men of all types are on the receiving end, husbands are the ones who get it worse

I don't doubt that if you totaled all the spending on these commercials you would conclude that "husbands are dumb" is the most popular advertising message in America. If TV commercials can shape the image of a sneaker or beer, what is it doing to the image of marriage.

...

I wonder if these ads are part of the reason that men are deserting TV, especially broadcast TV. The barrage of disparaging commercials just make it a little less appealing to the male demographic.

Absolutely, yes. My favorite television show is 7th Heaven. The fact that the show doesn't treat anybody as an idiot is one of the reasons that I like watching it. Other shows I watch include...uh...lemme think here...

Okay, so I don't watch a lot of shows. Sometimes I'll catch the Crocodile Hunter. Storm Stories and Mail Call are pretty good. I can always get into a decent documentary on the History Channel and Travel Channel's "Top blahblahblah of the World" are often entertaining. Notice a trend? I don't watch things that irritate me and the ever growing "guys are lovable losers/bumbling idots" thing has pretty much trashed television as an entertainment vehicle for me.

(Link snagged from Instapundit)

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We took Luuk to the Annual Pow-wow and Indian Festival at Stone Mountain Park. As expected we didn't see any Crows but we did run into some Creek, Chippewa and Iroquois. Luuk got a kick out of the inter-tribal dances. Those are the ones where anybody can join in. In typical bearish fashion he noted that the footwork of the medicine dances is quite a bit like an Irish jig. Pics are in the extended entry. Click on any of the little pics to see the full size jpgs. more...

Posted by: Jim at 09:37 AM | Comments (2) | Add Comment
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It's whether you win.

Survivor: The Blogoshpere Edition is set to begin and yours truly is a contestant. My competition is varied and skilled:

Jeff
Pylorns
Emily
Helen
LeeAnn

Good luck to all of my competitors. No, wait. I don't mean that at all. Bad luck to you! I wanna win.

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Fear not, Helen, Luuk has arrived at last! He's in pretty good shape except for some pretty nasty looking facial bruises. At first I was thinking this might be bear abuse. You know, it's always done by the last person you expect. I was about to call Child and Ursine Services on Don (he was the last person I expected, seeing as he hasn't met Luuk yet) but then Luuk assured me that it was a result of a bar fight. You're safe for now Don but I'll be keeping an eye on you.

He was a bit tired from his trip and passed out after 6 shots of Goldshlager. He's curled up on the bed right now. What a cutie. Fierce but cute, that is. He is a bear after all.

He got here just in time. Tomorrow we'll be going to the big Pow-wow at Stone Mountain. We're a bit south for good representation by my own tribe (Nana Peacock was a full blooded Crow indian) but there are lots of others there. Last year we were lucky enough to see a presentation by a group of Aztec dancers. Luuk and I will give you the lowdown when we get back tomorrow.

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Rachel doesn't get it.

Just in case anyone is actually still coming by (at last check, I'm still getting about 1,300 hits a day for some bizarre reason even though this blog sucks now and we all know it)

It's the same reason that Moses didn't get lynched some time during that 40 year hike. We know that some time in the future we will hit that Piquant link and be rewarded for our perseverance. Or maybe it's the same reason that a rat trained to hit a bar to get crack will keep hitting the bar even after it's changed to give him an electric shock instead of crack. Not sure which of those applies more. Anyway...

Rachel was the first big blogger to notice Snooze Button Dreams and is still at or near the top of my referers lise each month even though she's taking a break from blogging.

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The Letter of the Day is was "D".

"D" is for Doping, Doggy Style and Death Penalty Deferred.

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Actually, it's not so bad as that. Kim du Toit posted/ranted about being a manly man and Venomous Kate called him on it. Turns out they're positions are a lot closer than they thought at first. Good essay, good response, good commenting. This is what the Blogosphere is all about.

UPDATE: Ilyka's got two cents to spare on the subject. And it's a bargain at that price. Go read.

UPDATE 2: Michele's got it going on, too. A little bit of this and a little bit of that.

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The Carnival of the Vanities is launched over at WizBang. Very nifty election theme complete with trivia by my interrogator interviewer Jennifer.

But it's missing my own entry, which has made me grumbly.

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1 I swear it was their when I posted... In subsequent editing I must have *ahem* fixed it... Not to worry, I'll tuck it back into the Fiction and Short Stories where it was...

Posted by: Kevin at November 05, 2003 08:46 AM (bb8SE)

2 Thanks, Kevin.

Posted by: Jim at November 05, 2003 09:01 AM (IOwam)

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Jennifer's interview of me is ready for your perusal. Ever wonder what's up with the giant cow udder? Now's your chance to find out.

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You're not the sharpest tool in the box and often have to make up words to make yourself understood but you certainly know how to work the system as a Mr. President Bush. You take what you want, get people to do your dirty work but nurture your allies making you a great collaborator and very dangerous enemy.

Bush is an evil dictator? Gee, that is oh so clever. I've never heard any bit of hate speech even remotely like that. How original. Hey, Novistrana! How about a nice hot cup of shut the fuck up? (Dis credits to Right We Are)

Asshats.

(Hat tip to Kevin at Wizbang, though I doubt he knew about this particular quiz result.)

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Helen put up a list of the necessary traits in a man. Oddly enough her list is very close to the perfect man (that's me, by the way).

-Can make me laugh.
If this blog isn't proof enough, just wait till you see me naked!

-Loves hockey
Formative years spent in Buffalo, home of the Sabres. Hockey is therefore a love/hate thing with me.

-Tall
I absolutely tower over my kids.

-Big hands
It's not the size of the fingers but the hair on the palm. My fingers have been massaging things since I was 14. Only one female ever in my life has had a massage from me and not been seduced. And I'm still working on Mom. more...

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Well written, humorous and useful. DON'S MOSTLY USELESS GUIDE TO BECOMING A SUPERSTAR BLOGGER is a blogging hat trick. It's bound to be a well linked story so I will of course go for a ping in order to leach off of the readership it attracts.

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Laurence is mobilizing an army to take over the world! To join the ranks of the Amish Army just visit this page and click on the number that is presented. You can add one soldier each day to the mighty Amish forces.

One click a day. No pay or benefits but it's almost as easy as serving in the Navy.

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1 And we're being snarky about the Navy because?

Posted by: LeeAnn at October 29, 2003 04:07 PM (HxCeX)

2 Cause that's the only service I earned ragging privileges in. ;-)

Posted by: Jim at October 29, 2003 04:33 PM (fkewd)

3 Well, okay then. Thought I was gonna have to get all wicked-professional-Navy-dependent defensive and stuff.

Posted by: LeeAnn at October 29, 2003 05:19 PM (HxCeX)

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This week's Carnival of the Vanities is up at Who Censored Blogger Rabbit. It's in my greatly preferred format of easy to pore through post intros. Go give it a look-see.

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